19 Sep Hayley’s story
I lost my daughter Millie in 1999. I was only 22 when I fell pregnant and my scans up to 20 weeks were all normal and without alarm.
It wasn’t until I got to 31 weeks and I hadn’t felt her move that I started to worry, I was told I had a lazy baby don’t worry, I was sent to hospital and that’s when they found Millie was very poorly.
I was airlifted to a London hospital without my family Who had to travel by car and gave birth to Millie via c-section on my own.
I didn’t see Millie as she was taken from me to the specialist doctors. It wasn’t until some time later I was informed that after 40 minutes of trying to help her, she died without her mum being there, this still haunts me that I wasn’t there. I feel so guilty. I was then placed on a maternity ward and had to pass all the other women with their babies, this again haunts me.
I was sent home with no offer of counselling or help and believe this has impacted me my whole life.
I miss my daughter. Time is a healer but you never forget.
There are many organisations that offer support to anyone affected by pregnancy and baby loss.
Sands supports anyone affected by pregnancy loss or the death of a baby and works to save babies’ lives. Contact their Helpline via phone (0808 154 3332) or email, or visit their Support Groups online or via Zoom.